I want to start off by thanking ya'll for your continued support and readership! I really appreciate all your kind words and constant reminders of how great life really is.
You clearly deduced that Al and I have had a rocky month. Not rocky in the sense of losing faith in our relationship or love for each other. THAT's not going to happen. Just a rough time, 8 months in to the deployment, with the end on the horizon. We're both exhausted. After ANOTHER silly fight over that care package I sent him, I called time-out.
I told him I wanted to stop, take a deep breath and check in with each other. All couples go through rough days, weeks or months. The great couples check in and sort stuff out. And the strong, lifelong couples turn the page and move on.
So we did. No sense hashing over the same thing (He has a bad attitude because, well, his job sucks and he's surrounded by men who don't talk about things; I am crabby because I'm not busy enough to keep my head occupied and I tired of this deployment.) Instead, we decided move on. Rather then continue to get upset with each other over things that are really out of our control right now, we would get back to basics.
And here are the basics:
I love him, more then words. I can't be near him right now and that sucks. We are both on edge because of it. When you get past that inevitable fact, it's so worth every gosh darn agonizing second. I would do it again and again. I won't always smile and I can't say I won't bitch and complain, but I'll do it. Why? Because I love him and I want to spend my life with him.
When you look at it that way, who cares if some days are little rough. At the end, he's coming home to me. So, we're turning the page, nearing the end of this chapter and ready for the next.
Bring it on!
12 comments:
You almost got me scared at the beginning of the post. I completely understand you. Me and my husband fight a lot, but we end up making up all night for it....we know that we would spend the rest of our life fighting together and hashing things out, than not being together. I am sure this rough patch too shall pass...and once your baby is back, you will be too happy to blog!
www.musingsofanarmywife.blogspot.com
I really admire your positive attitude. When he's home this will all be worth it! (I know you already know that, but I just had to say it again, lol)
You are allowed to have crappy days. It's completely understandable. The end of the deployment is always the worst for me. Hang in there!
Great post. Kudos for both of you for being able to step back see the big picture instead of just the nitpicky things and move past it. So many couples destroy a relationship with all those "little" things because they can never step back and identify the real problem
I thought you were going to stop posting :( Then I though you and Al had broken up! Aghhhhh, you can't do that to my nerves!
One line that I remind myself of comes from the book "Committed," by Elizabeth Gilbert (she wrote Eat, Pray, Love), where her partner says to her "Let's be careful" (in reference to how they fight) when tensions are up and we might say something silly, simply out of circumstance.
Thinking of you!
Ya'll are such a good couple!
Ugh, I so know how it all goes with the deployment stuff. It's easy to get caught up in the madness and get frustrated. Good for you for getting back to basics! :)
Way to go. From what I've seen, you guys are a strong couple, and it'll take a lot more than this past month to break you down!
We should do a happy hour soon! I miss seeing people.
I am so happy for you. I think that movie "Wedding Date" said it best when he looks at her and says "I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else". My hubs and I found out that it was really true. <3
Good job at keeping your head up, I know deployments are $&*! haha. Just focus on that first hug and kiss and your head will spin. :)
Oh that's great! Turning the page and moving on!
I know exactly what you mean. My husband and I have been separated for almost 9 months now and near the end everything starts to take a toll. I am so ready for him to come home and for us to move on to the next chapter in our lives. Heres to turning the page! :)
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