It's never fun when doing the right thing makes you the bad guy.
I've been in an unwelcome living situation for months now. Last August, when I started school, I moved in with my childhood best friend. We knew each other, we trusted each other, and we had a dynamic that worked well. PLUS, we'd be home on opposite schedules so we'd really only see each other on the weekends. What could go wrong?
Nothing, at first. Things were fine. He was a little messy and smelly (what boy isn't) and he rarely picked up after himself, but after we set up a cleaning calendar and other ground rules things got better.
Then he got a girlfriend. She is a darling. I like her a lot and I think they're great for each other. But in the few short months they've been dating she's practically moved in. To make a long story short, she still has a lease elsewhere but it's too far from her new job to stay during the week. This means she can't actually move in and pay rent, help with groceries, etc...
But she still spends 75% of her time here: showering, eating dinner and watching TV (from a money standpoint, using groceries, utilities AND rental space - none of which she's contributing to.) I agreed to live with Scottie, not with his girlfriend. And I certainly didn't plan on running a hotel (especially a free one!)
Well, the shoe finally dropped last night and I said what I should have said earlier: this just isn't working. We need to set some boundaries or make new arrangements. She took it personal. I know it's hard to separate, but it really isn't personal. Regardless, it is important and it does need to change.
Bottom line: if they wanted to live together, I would step aside and let them have the apartment. We'd have to work it out with the landlord, of course, but it's theirs. That means I'm turning 26 in a few short weeks and probably moving back with my parents.
Honestly though, I will be saner, healthier and richer - so I guess it's not all bad.
1 comment:
I had two friends from high school that were always really, really close. When we started college, they decided to move in together. This worked out really well for about a year, until one of them started allowing her boyfriend to basically live there, eat their food, use their water, electricity and be a slob. When friend, L, finally spoke up and told them that they needed to start pay 2/3rd of the bills AND he needed to clean up after himself, their friendship slowly deteriorated into nothing. These girls grew up together, were inseparable in high school and now, they don't even talk due to the exact situation that you were in. I hope your friendship gets mended.
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