Our Story # 4: Tube Slides & Drive-thrus

{part 4 in a 7-part series about my journey of love, with Al by my side.}

It was time to visit Texas again and Memorial Day provided the perfect opportunity to get a few days off of work. I don't think any one trip could have been more wrong and yet so, so right.

I had decided, after getting ragged on by Al the last few times I'd traveled, to pack carry-on only this time. That meant less toiletries and less shoes. It wasn't really a big deal, but we'd have to make a Wal-mart trip when I got there.

So we did. We grabbed some basic necessities, snacks for the weekend and a couple of things Al needed. In the 20 minutes we were inside Wal-mart the weather completely shifted and it was total downpour. The thing about El Paso is that it doesn't rain very often. It's the middle of the desert and typically very dry. As a result there is no drainage system whatsoever and it only takes 10 minutes for the streets to flood.

We basically hydro-planed our way back to post.

Our place to stay fell through because they ended up having in-laws in town. This left us with a last minute decision on where I/we were going to sleep. We decided since it was a holiday weekend that I'd just sneak in the window at night and stay in the barracks. This is a lot less fun then it sounds.

You know in high school when your boyfriend snuck in after curfew through the unlocked window? (Me niether. I didn't have a boyfriend in high school. But I've seen it on Dawson's Creek.) Sneaking into the barracks was nothing like that. The windows are about chest high, a little TOO high to comfortably climb in. Plus, I had to heave my bag up into the window too.

A few bruises later, I was safely in Al's barracks room.

(Shh, don't tell anyone.)

The next day, we decided to check out a water park just over the border in New Mexico. It was a nice hot day and the crowds were a clear indicator of that. We slathered on the sunscreen and donned our flip flops and headed to get innertubes.

That in itself was an adventure. We asked where to get them and were directed to the table of teenage males handing them out. They responded with a little laziness and a lot of teenage angst - by pointing in the general direction of the customer service booth and mumbling something about a wrist band. I asked for clarification and was met with one scowl, one checking out my boobs and the third grumbling that we "need to get wrist bands at the booth."

We did and proudly returned to the table of boys to get our tubes. I snobbishly presented my wrist and asked for a tube and the kid responded by thrusting one in my direction.

Apparently, working at the water park isn't a desirable way to spend a summer.

Either that, or being a brat is the "cool" way to be a teen these days. Can't say I know.

We hit a few tube slides and then hopped in lazy river and floated our way around the park. After passing a few drunk families, screaming kids and other annoying people, we'd had enough and left.

The next day, we woke up and decided to hike the mountain again. But this time, we wanted to take one of the peaks that overlooks Mexico. It happens to be a big religious site for the area and has a series of crosses on the way up. There are other prayer sites and monuments as well as a big one at the peak. Apparently the place is jam-packed with people come holidays like Easter. It was worth checking out if only for the exercise and turned out to be a pretty interesting adventure.

We reached the peak, took a quick break and made our way back down. It was a few steps into the decline that I realized just how badly I had to pee. It was hot and I had drank an entire bottle of water on my way up. I was certain I could make it back down before needing a toilet, so I continued. Until I realized it was worse then I thought.

Al was already telling me that I should just go around a corner. I don't mind getting dirty and I'm not shy (pee-shy or the other kind) but I'd still prefer to use a toilet versus a rock. Still, it was apparent that I wasn't going to make it. So, with Al as a look-out I popped a squat on the side of a mountain overlooking Mexico.

I can't say I'm very experienced in peeing outdoors, so I struggled a bit to get a good stance and keep all the appropriate parts clean and out of the way. In my efforts to adjust, Al was laughing his head off. Which, of course, made me laugh, making the balancing act that much more difficult.

I peed on my shoe. Just a few drops, but pee nonetheless.

And Al laughed harder, I laughed harder.

Once I'd taken care of business, we kept on our dissent. I am pretty sure that Al made fun of me the entire way back down. Despite the "pee incident" it was a fun adventure and good exercise.

The old Mexican guys who ran the place gave us a beer at the bottom and chatted with Al about the Army. Turns out one of them was a veteran and was thrilled to have someone to talk to. I was just happy to sit down.

We decided to stop at DQ on the way back to post. The drive thru was set up extremely awkwardly and not at all labeled clearly. We ended up pulling up to the order box backwards. Rather then turn around like a normal person would, Al figured we could just order like that.

I placed our order and expected Al to turn us around before pulling up to the window.

Nope.

Instead, I found myself face-to-face with the drive-thru clerks trying desperately to see through the tears streaming down my face. I was in hysterics. I couldn't even breathe properly, let alone hand them the money and take our food.

While my boyfriend sat there in the drivers' seat proud of his antics, I struggled through completing the transaction, wiping tears from my eyes, sitting in my own pee.

And I couldn't have been happier.

{Next in the series: I have problems with the airline and a cop thinks I'm a hooker.}